charlieDEAN’S Blog

It’s noon on Wednesday. I’m still wearing my pajama pants and the sweatshirt that I put on immediately after getting out of bed at 6:45am. I’m unshaven, my hair is disheveled, and I’m sure that my breath isn’t great either after drinking almost an entire pot of coffee this morning by myself. Jennifer and the boys are gone, and it’s just me in my house. And it’s quiet.

We call it a desert day.

One of the perks of Northwoods is that we get one day a month to get out of the office, pray, read, think, slow down a little. (Other churches give Sabbaticals once every five-seven years…I think this way is better…just my opinion, although if there were Sabbaticals to take, I take one!)

Here’s some of what I did today…I was a bit abbreviated because I had a meeting tonight at church that I needed to prep for and attend…but anyway.

• I completed my January Bible readings in Genesis, Acts, Psalms & Matthew. So far, so good this year.



• I started reading Chazown by Craig Groeschel. I’m really excited to take this book slowly — doing the journalling excercises and sucking the marrow out of this book.
• I listened to a Rob Bell message.
• I prayed.



• I read Flashbang: How I Got Over Myself. I read the whole book. It took just over four hours or so. We’re basing our Nexus teaching and the house group discussions for February on this book so I wanted to get it into my head again. I read it in 2005, and it cracked me up, but at the same time challenged me…it was probably better the second time, because I’ve gotten older, more mature, and I think I have a greater awareness of my infatuation with myself.
• I moved slowly…drank a lot of coffee…paused when I read something good…listened to Charlie Hall…then Counting Crows.

yes, this Desert Life was an album title for the Counting Crows…I’m apparently lacking in blog title originality these days.

At the risk of elevating one of God’s charateristics over all the others, I believe that one of the neglected attributes of God in the white, evangelical tradition that I come from God’s desire for justice. In fact the only time I heard people talk about God’s justice it seemed, was when they talking about why people go to hell for eternity.

But over the last couple of years, as I try to understand more and more about the kingdom of God is and try to live out the Lord’s prayer (“your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven”), there’s been a growing sense that as Christian I should be lending my voice to issues of justice.

Recently, as I’ve been pastoring at LifeBridge, I’ve grown more connected to Carl Cannon, a local community activist. Anyway, yesterday, in Peoria, the third apparent homicide of the year was committed (pjstar article here). Therefore, on Tuesday night at 6:00, Carl has organized another community prayer vigil to say “enough,” to the criminals of Peoria. The vigil will be at Taft Homes — very close to where 16-year old Domonique Alexander lived.

You may ask, why is rural boy that lives in Brimfield, and works at the large, white church at the north end of town going to be standing in the freezing cold at Taft Homes on a Tuesday night. The answer, is that I have a growing sense that wherever I feel led, I must lend my voice to issues of justice.

Anyone want to join me?

Damien Rice

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Pretty mellow, standard Damien Rice stuff…I wish I would have gotten the Wal-Mart version — there’s one song that I’m going to have to delete from my computer if I’m ever going to play it in the house when my kids are awake.

All American Rejects

Move Along

This is almost a perfect album for working out…I know that true punk fans probably consider this to “pop-y,” but I like it…reminds me a little of Good Charlotte.

My Chemical Romance

Another good album to work out to. Good rock album — sometimes there’s a 70’s rock vibe that I dig.

Over the last couple of years, I’ve been on a spiritual journey of sorts. I read a book with a guy when I was living in Pekin that challenged me in regards to my stance about war and violence. So, in the past couple years, I’ve started to label myself an “almost pacifist.” Really, I would have to say that I probably still believe in “just-war theory,” but that’s a discussion for another time.

Here’s the point of the post. Over the last couple of days I’ve been listening to the Mars Hill podcast, specifically the series, “Calling all Peacemakers,” and something (I don’t know if Rob Bell actually said it or not), became clear in my mind: the difference between pacifism & non-violence).

“Pacifism” as a term hasn’t really settled with me because, when I think of “pacifism,” I think of non-involvement — of disengagement. “Non-violence,” however suggest that there are things I should “fight for” but always on the principle of non-violence.

Sorry…I don’t have time to say more here…but if you have questions, please leave them in the comments and I’ll try to respond.

Following Dave’s lead, I took the test…it’s the same result as when I took the full Myers-Briggs when I was in college.

Yeah, I tend to avoid politics, because it really riles people up in a hurry, but in the nature of honesty and full-disclosure I have to say…

Do you remember this post? It was the most-commented-on post of my blogging career (22 comments).

I have to admit that I’m there. I’m really struggling with a hatred of our president. I know, hatred is an ugly word and an ugly concept — but everytime I see his face on TV or hear his voice, I have to mentally & spiritually go through the process of letting it go. I don’t like feeling this way — it’s really a struggle.

Last night I met with the elder board here at NW, to talk about the future of LifeBridge. I have to say, that I have such high regard for our elders. It’s good to be part of an organization where you trust and admire the leadership. In other contexts I’ve been in, this wasn’t necessarily the case…and it’s not fun.

I’ve been thinking more about my last post and thought I’d solicit a little advice. Let me know what comes to mind…

How did your dad form you?

-or-

How did your dad fail to form you, and you wish he had?

This afternoon (Saturday) I took my two oldest boys for a walk in the woods on a day when it was clear outside and about 25 degrees. We went to Jubilee State Park and spent about 45 minutes hiking, walking over fallen logs, looking at the trees covered in ice and scaring all the wildlife for a good two mile radius. Gavin took a header running down a hill and wailed at the top of his lungs, Caleb spotted a downy woodpecker and I was filled with wonder that I get the opportunity to shape these two boys (and of course, two others, as well, eventually).

There was a moment in the woods, where I thought of John Eldredge’s Wild at Heart, and this idea, that one of my jobs is to teach my boys what it means to be men — real men. I don’t mean the macho man stereotype that is so prevalent today, but I don’t mean the “sissified” version either. I was specifically thinking today of overcoming fears — having the confidence to try, where you might be afraid of failing — or falling in this case.

Today the lessons were to (1) overcome some fears (like walking across downed logs covered in ice and snow), (2) that dad loves to be with them in the woods and (3) Gavin learned that deer, as a rule, don’t generally attack you (especially when you’re as loud as the two of them are!)

Caleb: Mommy, how will the baby come out?

Jen: Do you really want to know, Caleb?

Caleb: Yeah, I really want to know.

Jen: Well, there’s two ways…aunt Andrea had Elsa the way where they cut across her stomach and the doctor takes the baby out. Mommy did it the other way. Where I pushed the baby out through a hole called the vagina…kinda down by my pee-pee. It hurts and it’s hard to push it out.

Caleb: Woah! I’m so glad I’m a boy!

Jen: Yeah…that’s nice.

Caleb (looking at Gavin): Well, someday we’re going to have to build houses, so I guess it’s fair!

From a week ago…in the middle of a wrestling match…

Caleb: Daddy, you know what? (as he rubs his cheek) I think my beard is coming in.